The Maid of Honor Bachelorette Planning Checklist (Every Week, Step by Step)

The Honest Truth About Being Maid of Honor

You are the cruise director. The accountant. The therapist. The DJ. The bachelorette is your project to manage, and the bride is your client. Most MOHs underestimate the time this takes by about 3x.

The good news is that almost all of the work happens in the first 6 weeks of planning. After that you are mostly confirming and reminding. Get the foundation right and the trip runs itself.

Month 6 (or As Soon As You Say Yes)

Talk to the Bride First

Before you send a single group text, sit with the bride. Ask three questions:

• What is your ideal vibe? Party, relaxed, adventure, foodie, wellness?
• Who absolutely has to be there?
• What is the maximum total budget you would feel comfortable asking your friends to spend?

That third question is the one most MOHs skip. The bride should set the ceiling because she knows her friends best. Do not pick Cabo for a group that can only afford Nashville.

Build the Guest List

The bride gives you names and emails. You build a contact list. Confirm with the bride who is in the bridal party versus invited friends only.

Month 5

The Budget Conversation Nobody Wants to Have

Send a private message to each attendee asking for their realistic budget. Not a group poll. Group polls force people to over commit to look generous.

Sample message: "Hi friend, planning Brides bachelorette and want to make sure we pick something that works for everyone. What is the most you could comfortably spend total, including flights, lodging, food, and activities? Be honest, this stays between us."

Take the lowest budget you get and use that as your target. If 8 out of 9 can spend $1,200 and one can only spend $600, the polite thing is to either pick a $600 trip or let that friend opt out of the destination weekend without guilt.

Send a Save the Date

Once you have a destination and dates locked, send a save the date with the headline number per person. People plan flights and PTO around this.

Month 4

Book Lodging

This is the biggest line item. Book the Airbnb or hotel rooms first and require a deposit from each guest within 2 weeks. The 2 week deadline weeds out flakes early.

Use a tool like Splitwise or a shared Google Sheet to track every payment. The bride does not pay for the bachelorette weekend, her share is split among the other attendees.

Lock the Big Activities

Book the boat charter, the brunch reservation, the party bus, and the dinner reservations. These sell out 6 to 12 weeks in advance for peak season weekends. Pay deposits where required and bill the group.

Month 3

Build the Itinerary

A simple Google Doc with every day broken into morning, afternoon, and evening. Include addresses, reservation times, dress codes, and confirmation numbers.

Share with the group 2 months out. They can plan outfits and any solo time they want.

Decide on Themes and Outfits

Pick the bachelorette theme with the bride and decide what each person wears each night. Order matching outfits, sashes, accessories, or anything you need from the group. Allow 4 to 6 weeks for shipping to be safe.

Month 2

Plan Decorations and Welcome Bags

Welcome bags do not need to be elaborate. A tote with a water bottle, a hangover kit, snacks, sunscreen, and a personalized note from the bride. Budget $20 to $40 per bag.

For decorations, focus on the arrival moment. The bride walks into the Airbnb and there are balloons, a sash, a chilled bottle of champagne, and a personalized banner. That photo carries the trip.

Send Final Payment Requests

By 6 weeks out, everyone should have paid in full for lodging, activities, and any group dinners. Hold the line on this. Late payments stress everyone.

Month 1

Send the Final Briefing

Two weeks before the trip, send a final document with:

• Full itinerary with addresses and reservation times
• Dress code for each night
• Group chat link if you have not made one yet
• Emergency contacts for the MOH and one backup
• Packing list including any specific items like cowboy boots, swimsuits, or hiking shoes
• The bride share breakdown so nobody is surprised at the airport

Confirm Every Reservation

Call or email each restaurant, bar, activity, and transportation vendor 5 to 7 days out. Confirm headcount, time, and special requests like a bride shoutout.

The Week Of

• Print backup copies of every confirmation
• Pack the welcome bags and decorations in one suitcase you carry on
• Confirm one final time with the group on dietary restrictions and any allergies
• Pre-pay anything you can to skip lines
• Get 8 hours of sleep the night before, you will not get it again until you are home

The Trip Itself

Your job during the trip is not to drink the most. It is to keep the group moving. Have the itinerary on your phone. Know when the next Uber needs to be ordered. Know which restaurant has a 15 minute grace period and which will lose the reservation.

Pay the group bill if everyone is splitting, then settle on Venmo in the morning. It is faster and the staff loves you.

"My MOH had every reservation on a sheet with names, times, and addresses. Nobody else had to think for 3 days. Best gift she could have given me." Reddit

After the Trip

Send a thank you note to each attendee within 2 weeks. Personalize each one. Then collect the photos into a shared album for the bride.

The Mistakes That Kill Bachelorettes

• Picking a destination before confirming budgets, you lock out friends
• Polling the group on every decision, decide and inform instead
• Letting payments slide past deadlines, it always blows up
• Forgetting the bride share split, send it in writing upfront
• Over scheduling, leave one open block per day for the group to decide together

The One Rule Above All

The bachelorette is for the bride. When in doubt, do what she wants. You are not throwing the bachelorette you would want. You are throwing the bachelorette she would want.